And you thought the Edgeworth game was different...

(I sent this to Michael, my brother, on 1/10/08. I changed the text a little for clarity.)

I was playing a bizarre new "Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney" game. You were Phoenix. There were three different bizarre detectives, each responding to a different communicator. One of your items was some kind of laser sword. The boss was Dahlia, the evil ex-girlfriend from the third game (and not evil as in "oh, she's a bitch, she's evil," I mean she is actually demonic). Instead of fighting her with the sword, however, the end was a rhythm game. For the most part, you had to draw stuff on the wall with the laser sword in time to the music, including faces, letters, and kanji, and you had very little time to draw each one. The middle part, however, was pointing the sword at evil girls and shaking it at them, temporarily turning them into little bunnies, which somehow kept them from being evil, but then they would keep turning back. It was for the Nintendo DS, but it could also project onto the wall, and the stylus acted like a Wiimote.

Obviously, I sucked at it.

Common dream themes

TOPIC OF DISCUSSION! I am encouraging everyone to list some recurring themes they have noticed across many dreams. Here are some of mine:

--Being in a car with no one driving.
--My teeth falling out.
--Being able to get from place to place by floating. I tuck my legs backward, expecting to fall, but I just kinda float to my destination without having to put my legs down.
--Being inside a surreal, elaborately-designed movie theater.

Before I returned to finish college, the following two themes kept popping up:
--Going back to high school, noticeably older than everyone else, and feeling completely out of place.
--Going back to elementary school, because I felt that by leaving college, I had failed so badly that I had to do everything over again.

These are currently the only ones I can think of.

I have been keeping track of my dreams for a long time, and I will soon repost some of the older ones.

Phone Call From Eddie Vedder

I received an unexpected phone call from Eddie Vedder. We exchanged pleasantries, and then he launched into a long, rambling soliloquy, of which I couldn't understand a single word. When he finished, I didn't know how to respond so I said "Yeah..." and added a slight chuckle for good measure.

Runnin' Slidin' Zombie

I'm in a large crowd of people on a subway, and I'm wearing an elaborate zombie costume. Everyone else is wearing a costume, too -- it's a costume contest. We pour out of the subway car and flood the corridors of the station. We're supposedly parading our costumes so that we can be judged, but we're running way too fast and there's too many people for assessment to even be possible. We run up flights of stairs and escalators, down long hallways, and crowd into elevators. As I run, I occasionally try to do a stilted zombie gait, but I lose a lot of speed when I do that.

Eventually, the crowd peters out, and I end up running into an elevator with only one other person -- someone wearing a mean rhino mask with a mafia-esque suit and tie. I decide to pretend to be a real zombie, so I start attacking him clumsily, as a zombie would. He runs out of the elevator and down some stairs. I pursue him, and we come to another elevator. He enters, but blocks me from entering, and the doors close. I run down the stairs and meet him when he comes out, but he runs away and I do not pursue.

The chase has led me to the mall. It's large and fancy. My friend Mark shows up, and we start to run through the mall. I discover that if I give myself a burst of running speed, I can slide on my toes. Sort of like rollerblading. I repeatedly run and slide, and I build up a lot of speed that way. Soon I'm zooming through the mall, avoiding chairs, signs, and potted plants.

When I reach the end of the mall (a large plywood wall), I can't slow down and I slam into it at a high rate of speed. I'm okay, though. In a nearby store, there's a talk show taking place, and Lady Gaga is the guest. The host is wearing a "costume" (fake beard and sunglasses). Lady Gaga is taking about Shakespeare.

David Cross is bald

Got a Mr Show dvd. The cover was a giant picture of David Cross's head. Then, either in the dream or in my mind, I realized I already had better Mr Show dvds. I felt ripped off.

(Pasted directly from my cell phone, dated June 17, 2010)

Realistic Cartoons

Had a dream in which i was reading something comparing the Simpsons to Peanuts. In short, it said that a cartoon can only have realistic drawings or realistic subject matter, not both. So the Simpsons, with its four-fingered yellow people, was more realistic than Peanuts. Also, Peanuts was drawn more elaborately in my dream.

(Pasted directly from my cell phone, dated June 18, 2010)

Drugz

I got high by drinking a test tube of green, lime-flavored liquid.

The Man Whose Eyes Were Connected to His Brain

The man approached our table at the restaurant and did a little introductory jig -- "ta da!" He introduced himself as a man with an affliction known as Small File, or Brain Cabinet. In other words, his eyes were connected directly to his brain. This condition, he explained, was discovered when some scientists examined the brain of a pirate with "extremely leftist tendencies." Apparently, having this condition makes your eyes slightly evil. In fact, this man's left eye had murdered his right eye.

I'm pretty sure he was asking for money.

Hot Pink Whistle; Man Made of Burps

A couple nights ago I had a dream where I was in class, not sure if it was high school or college. There was going to be a talent show that day, which I was completely unprepared for. The teacher wanted me to go first, but I didn't know what to do - so she handed me a hot pink whistle and motioned for me to sit on a bar stool in the front of the room. The understanding was that I was supposed to play something on the whistle, even though it was like one of those gym whistles that only makes one noise. So I started trying to make a noise with it, but I couldn't get enough air going to make a substantial noise (I think I was nervous). I was trying to get some kind of rhythm going, but the air flow problem made that difficult. Eventually I started spinning around on the barstool - not just my body but the whole stool, even though it's not an easily spinnable object. This made me feel better - I felt that by spinning the barstool, I was exhibiting some real talent.

Then last night, Arthur and I made up this story (it was close to 3 am and we were both getting very sleepy):

Once, there was a man made out of burps. The End.

Hand Shoppin Moppin

I was in a mall, and I had an item to purchase but instead of walking normally through the store I noticed a lot of people crawling and pushing their items through the store. I joined in and walked through a few departments, occasionally looking to see if others were still pushing their items. "This is silly!" I thought right before I stood up to see a man (also standing) looking disgusted at me. I suppose it's OK to walk upright if you're just browsing but it is a huge faux pas to do so after you've plucked an item.

I walked a bit until I began to notice people organizing the mall, and suddenly I walked into a grand display living room. The design was rich and Victorian. The paintings dominated the walls they were on, and the people that were cleaning were donned in fur coats and fancy hats. I looked over at a woman who shrugged a reply "It's better than cleaning your own house." I could relate to that statement for some reason.

I looked over at a woman and two little girls. Suddenly the dream felt like I was watching a movie. I went from active participant to distant observer. There may have even been a hint of smooth narrator but that's neither here nor there. In any case, I learned that this woman was hiding out from the law, and living with here children in this huge living room in the mall. I watched them interact, and I noted that her "little girls" seemed more like heavily trained 30 something killers.

The dream is a became fuzzy at this point. All I can remember is the mother was protecting her children, and was gunned down by the law. At this point in the dream I became one of the little girls. The mall workers/law enforcers were dressed like nurses but their outfits felt more like one of the suits the bad guys wore at the end of E.T. They were bringing food to me and my little sister; however, they kept us locked up in the mall living room, presumably because we were so dangerous. I was devising an escape plan, and though thwarted many times we eventually escaped, though I can't remember how.

I was myself for the next part of my dream, and I was sitting on a building in Scranton City with Dan. We were watching this crazy woman talking about faith and doing crazy stunts. She claimed faith allowed her to jump with ease from a height that I wouldn't attempt to jump from. I remember thinking this woman was both annoying and mad (crazy). I don't quite remember but I'm pretty sure she had broke into song, and one of her stunts was suddenly taking place behind us. "FAITH!!! It's what allows me to climb the triangles!" she sang and/or shouted to the crowd. The triangles that she referred to were actually a long string of Christmas lights. Apparently we were suppose to be impressed that she was climbing the Christmas lights because if she slipped lights would break off and cause potential damage to her hands. "This is stupid" I thought to myself, though I do remember being impressed as she ascended the lights.

Suddenly I was in the Sears Tower (in Scranton) with this crazy woman who wanted me to run up all the stairs of this building.....ALL 15 (impressive lol). She felt more like a motivational speaker at this point, and less of a religious nut, so I began to run up all the stairs. I decided not to count for a while, so I would be pleasantly surprised at how many flights I'd passed. She seemed to float beside me, and we were talking the whole way. "You know Arthur did this too!" Amy and Arthur must have been lurking in the back outside because I accepted that they were there. "Oh yeah?" I asked "How long did it take him?" The woman replied "About 10 minutes." I remember being impressed with this, and I replied "Oh, so that's why Arthur's been running!" I kept running, and eventually passed the woman until I got to the 10th floor. Up until that point the stairs were solid, carpeted, and surrounded by walls. After the 10th floor you could see all the remaining flights, and they were open metal mesh. They were also in the glass dome at the top of the building, so I could see exactly how high I was.

Everything felt like it was moving at this point, and I told the woman I couldn't do it. I told her I was having an "actual episode" because it truly looked like everything was swirling around me. Ya know....kind of like those cheesy effects they do when emphasizing a characters fear of heights.

At this point the stairs changed into crazy death traps that required balance, courage, and jumping to navigate them. Dan was there at this point with our kitties, and they were chasing bugs. I saw Okanini begin to fall, and I shouted for Dan to catch her. The dream dissolved as I woke up and BAM crazy dream :).